Walking in Sir Graham's footsteps

In our first week of our time in Ancud, Chiloe, I was asked to help put with the local rugby team, no doubt due to my extensive qualifications (i.e. owning an All Blacks shirt). The coach wanted me to teach the team touch rugby, to help them learn how to play faster and pass better. After 2 training sessions, people (me) have been struck by my similarities to Sir Graham Henry:

1.) We both have coached at an (arguably) high level
2.) We both worked at Kelston Boys High
3.) We both overcame significant adversity (Him: 20 years without the World Cup, the feeling we might choke on the biggest stage. Me: There is no rugby field in Ancud. The soccer field we use is only 15% grass and has two resident horses)
4.) We both have achieved greatness (Him: Winning the World Cup. Me: Teaching the team how to play touch rugby).
5.) We both own a beanie (see photo below).

Graham ponders his appalling lack of ginger facial growth

Practically brothers! Surely I'm also destined for a long and prosperous career. I'll admit, I actually hoped when I first appeared at training that some of the team might mistake me for Tigers and Australian centre, Chris Lawrence. Sadly they did not. In fact, only one of them has seen rugby league before. He is also the only one who speaks English.

My first task was to revolutionise the warm-ups. They showed me their first exercise: ankle circles, standard stuff. I then suggested that this should be followed by a calf stretch. This was unheard of. I initially thought they were joking, but they had never seen the standard calf stretch, and players were soon grasping their freshly-stretched calf muscles making noises of amazement. I continued to show them an array of very simple stretches, again met with equal amounts of joy and wonder. Intrigued, I asked them what their usual warm up consisted of. It was very hard not to laugh. You too would laugh, if you saw 19 Chilean males looking like they are performing hula hooping. In all earnestness. Without the hoops.

I then proceeded to show them how to play touch rugby. It was surprisingly difficult not having the words for  dummy half, play the ball, or "just run straight at him", but they picked it up pretty well. We then separated the team into forwards and backs, and I watched the overenthusiastic forwards coach teach the two most difficult lineout moves in existence, including the one-armed gridiron throw to the back of the lineout. I did my best to suggest the merits of throwing to the guy at number two in the lineout.

The club is very new (6 months old) and they have only played one game to date. They lost by 80 points and didn't manage to win a single set piece. I'm hoping with my little bits of coaching genius, they will improve dramatically. Sir Graham will be proud.